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August 2024
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One Dog's Festivitas7/7/2024 Often, I write about nature. Today, I write in tribute to the miraculous Flo, who passed suddenly from our midst on July 3rd, 2024. On June 29th, 2022, Flo came waddling out to greet me in the waiting room at the shelter. Before her rescue by these good people, she had been abused, confined, and overfed. She should have weighed just under forty pounds, but weighed seventy-five. She cringed at the sight of paper, at the sound of a raised voice, at the sight of a male person. Yes, she was very damaged. She still walked up to me, eyes glowing, and rested her chin in my hands. The bond was immediate and permanent. Flo looked directly into my soul, and loved me anyway. Flo was not an easy dog. She barked at the door at walk time, a shrill staccato yip that she finally managed to reduce to warbling and singing. She would then race for the gate, and the process would start again. If there was a car ride as well . . . I think you see the pattern! On walks, my gentle Shay would pace at my side, while Flo twirled at the end of her leash like an ecstatic whirligig. That was what defined her, and made her a joy--her jubilation, her celebration of every moment. Her festivitas. Was it time for coffee? Flo was going to watch! The composter needed emptying? Flo was on the way! Bed-time? Let's check the gate, the garden, the clothesline! For every trip I made to the garden with a load of water, Flo made ten, spinning around me, racing back and forth, her herding instincts in full play. Every moment, every act, was a celebration. For Flo, life was special, not a moment neglected. Most of all, she was a teacher. In that first moment, she recognized and blessed my brokenness. An abuse survivor herself, she taught me that every abuse survivor is worthy of great love and that the love given by an abuse survivor is pure, not tainted. She was healing for me. She loved her Shay, coaxing her from her own grief over the loss of her beloved mentor and guide, Mikak. She taught Shay to play again, to share again, to watch her dish when a hungry Border Collie was near. She zipped everywhere, and those extra pounds fell away. She grew sleek and lithe. Festivitas. Merriment and celebration. These were the gifts Flo brought to her home. And let us not forget dancing. Flo loved a good beat and would bark with enthusiasm, twirling in circles, giving herself a shake from head down to tail, ending in a little kick. She loved Jingle Bell Rock and The Tennessee Flat-top Box, and especially the spiritual I'll Fly Away. But it had to be sung with gusto. With festivitas. On July 1st, 2024, she barked for her car ride to the Park. During the day, lameness set in. She had stumbled earlier; had she pulled something perhaps? It worsened and in the night we participated in a vet video consult; the gentle vet was concerned about neurological sources and urged us to get her to our family vet. The family vet in town sent us immediately to the Veterinary College for neurological assessment and surgery, a mere five hours away and we headed straight from our vet's office. Generous neighbours took over the care of Shay. That evening when we arrived, the neurological team met us with a gurney; neurological tests and CT scan were completed. Flo had now lost all use of hind limbs, and had no pain response. Surgery might go ahead if it would be helpful--and safe. But the progression was alarmingly fast. On the morning of July 3rd, Flo was very weak, and the team recommended we take her home to say goodbye. I sat in the waiting room while they brought her out. She was very damaged. And somehow so small. She still walked up to me, eyes glowing, and rested her chin in my hands. Flo looked directly into my soul, and shared her strength. We had a wonderful car ride at first, sharing the music, telling the stories. When I scooped her out and placed her on the grass, she flopped on her side, writhing, her legs refusing to obey. I knew what lay ahead, when the paralysis reached her chest. I made the call. I sang I'll Fly Away as she passed, and sang it again over the beautiful grave overlooking her gate and her garden, the resting place my neighbours prepared. And when my time comes, do not be sad. Sing I'll Fly Away, please. Roar it out and dance and clap. For somewhere, a Border Collie and I will be dancing. Forever Flo. Forever festivitas. Thank you for your gifts, dear friend.
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Sharon
7/7/2024 05:17:20 pm
A beautiful tribute.. thank you for sharing Flo with us.
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Anne Michelle
7/8/2024 08:44:29 am
Thank you very much, Sharon, for your kind expression of sympathy. Her joy touched so many hearts.
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France
7/7/2024 08:40:42 pm
What a beautiful tribute to Shay. My sympathies to you and Flo for your loss of a loving companion. She’s running free with Mikak now in the spirit world. Just before my Dad died he said his dog was coming to get him. Roger, the first sled dog he trained when he was a boy. Roger was a white husky. Roddy sends his regrets at your loss. Thinking of you.
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Anne Michelle
7/8/2024 08:49:21 am
Many thanks, France and Rod, for your kind expression of sympathy. Yes, Flo runs free now. I sincerely believe Mikak sent her to me and Shay for our healing. I love to think of our dogs coming to guide our transition, like your dad's white husky Roger did for him. Thank you for sharing that story.
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Jeanne Kucherean
7/7/2024 09:47:32 pm
Ah my dear cousin Michelle,
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Anne Michelle
7/8/2024 08:53:35 am
Thank you so much for this, Jeanne. Yes, our memories are truly special gifts. One of her greatest joys was writing time. She always raced ahead of me to situate herself by the desk, listening to every word. Sometimes she would whuff as if to say, "A good editor would certainly be helpful here!"
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Jane Wood
7/8/2024 01:15:35 am
This is a beautiful tribute, Michelle, Flo was very lucky to have found you, and you her. Losing an animal is so very painful, will be thinking of you in the days and weeks ahead.
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Anne Michelle
7/8/2024 08:57:57 am
Thank you, Jane. Yes, it is painful, and a week ago I was looking forward to many more years together. I am so grateful that she taught me to value each moment. We told all our stories together on the long drive back from PEI; there were so many wonders in those two years we shared.
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Grace Gillighan
7/8/2024 04:13:34 pm
I am so sorry to hear of Flo's passing, Michelle. I know what she meant to you and you to her. I pray that in the days and weeks ahead, many beautiful memories will fill your heart and that your mind will be at peace that you gave her happiness and love during those two years that she might never have known if you had not connected. Love to you and Shay and may the support of friends and family help you through this difficult time.
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Anne Michelle
7/9/2024 02:42:51 pm
That is so beautiful, Grace. Thank you so much. Yes, the two years were short, but they were rich in moments and memories. So much to be thankful for.
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Lindy
7/8/2024 10:51:03 pm
I am so sorry for your loss. Your tribute is so beautiful and I know your kind heart provided friendship and love for Flo. Sending hugs your way.
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Anne Michelle
7/9/2024 02:44:59 pm
Thank you so much, Lindy. Flo was so full of love, and she had such enthusiasm for every moment.
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